


For All Who Come to This Happy Place

by Superdaisies



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Disneyland Trip, Disneyland food doesn't fit dietary guides, Established Relationship, Jack lets himself be happy, M/M, its all fluff, jack and bitty go to disneyland
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-21
Updated: 2016-03-22
Packaged: 2018-05-28 03:25:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6313507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Superdaisies/pseuds/Superdaisies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack Zimmermann lets himself be happy at the happiest place on Earth, with the happiest boy he knows. </p><p>Aka: Bitty color coordinates his fanny packs and Jack wears a lot of silly hats.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chowder in a Bread Bowl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jack and Bitty DO NOT go to Disneyland in the first chapter, but there will be a lot more soon, I promise!  
> Someone once said, write what you know. And I know a lot about Disneyland. I also have a strong desire for Jack Zimmermann to let himself be happy.  
> This is 0% how the NHL works, I'm positive. But I needed a reason for them to be in California. Also, sorry Ducks fans.  
> This is my very first posted fic ever, and especially my first for this fandom!! 
> 
> My Check Please! tumblr is litshitzimbit  
> My personal tumblr is superdaisies

_Jack: when is your spring break?_

Bitty: starts march 14

Bitty: im still ok to come up for the week right???

_Jack: Hmm_

Bitty: oh no

Bitty: :((((

Bitty: What happened

_Jack: I thought we were playing in providence that week_

_Jack: But we’re not_

Bitty: are you playing close by?

_Jack: Yeah. Pretty close. It’s only California._

Bitty: :OOOOOOOOOOO

Bitty: :((((((((((((((((((((((

Bitty: Please don’t beat the sharks too bad

Theres not enough consolation pies

in the world for Chowder

_Jack: Haha_

_Jack: Not sharks_

_Jack: Ducks_

_Jack: and the kings later in the week_

Bitty: Chowder just screamed

Bitty: Why is he screaming

_Jack: actually wait_

_Jack: I have an idea_

_Jack: Call me_

 

            “’Scuse me,” Bitty stood from the table, squeezing past the frogs and tads who’d all gathered for Saturday morning pancakes.

            “Are you calling Jack??” Chowder called after him, “I have to tell Jack something!”

            “You have Jack’s number, call him yourself!”

            “Wait, Chowder, you have _Jack Zimmerman’s_ phone number? You can call him _whenever you want_?” Normally, Chowder would have stopped to tell the tadpoles that everyone other than them has Jack’s number. And just because you _can_ call a celebrity, doesn’t mean you _should._ He’d been working on impulse control.

He would have, if he weren’t bolting after Bitty, ignoring all his impulse control.

“Jack? Hey babe, what is it that you want to akdjfbh---- HEY CHOWDER GIVE IT BACK” He yelled as the goalie sprinted up the stairs, three at a time, grabbing his phone on the way up.

“Jack?! JACK! It’s Chowder! I need you to do me a favor. Please? I need you to-,” He panted, as he rounded the corner, slammed his door and rolled into the bathroom he shared with Lardo, who was brushing her teeth.

Chowder jumped into the bathtub, put a finger to his lips at Lardo, and focused his attention back on his phone. His voice was barely a whisper now “Jack, I need you to do me a favor. I need you to kill the Ducks.”

“You need me to what?”

“Kill them”

The sound of a very small hockey player attempting to check the bathroom door from Lardo's room rattled the bathtub, making Chowder hunch even closer to the phone.

“YO BITS WHAT THE FUCK I’m taking a shit bro,” Lardo yelled through a mouthful of toothpaste, trying not to laugh.

“Kill them? Literally? That might be a bit more than a major, Chowder,” Jack responded, in his best attempt at his old captain’s voice, though he was obviously fighting the urge to laugh.

A second slam from Bitty threatened the ancient door, “I thought you had my back, Lards!”

“Kill them. Full shutout. Make them cry. I don’t know. Just… make sure that they don’t win or score or have a single celly. I need them to DIE Jack. Miserable, painful death. Got it?”

“Are you feeling ok?” Jack knew that Chowder got a bit intense on the ice, but that rarely translated to everyday stuff.

A third Bittle Bounce shook a little bit of plaster from the ceiling. “Pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaase Lardo”

“Who are you looking for? Chowder? I’ve never met anyone by that name” Lardo shouted as Chris jumped out of the bathtub.

“Death! Kill the Ducks! Please! I love you!” he shouted as he threw the phone to Lardo, throwing his door open, and running to try and find a safe place to hide. Lardo unlocked her door as Bitty was gearing up for a fourth attack. The sudden lack of door caused him to trip forward, slamming into Lardo.

“Jesus, Bits. Save it for the ice. Oh! Look what I found next to the sink!” She placed the phone into his hands, as she walked into her room and started rummaging for pants. “You should be more careful where you leave that. You never know who’ll try to take it,” she laughed, and a faint, deep, electronic laughter came from the phone echoed.

“Jack!” Bitty turned bright red, remembering Jack had been witness to the shenanigans of the last minute. He ducked away from Lardo, shuffling down the hall back into his own room. Making sure to lock the door behind him, he focused back on the Very Important Conversation that his boyfriend had wanted to have.

Jack was still faintly chuckling when Bitty placed the phone up to his ear again.

“I’m so sorry about that,” Bitty murmured as he flopped onto his bed, turning on speakerphone.

“Hey, don’t worry about it. I… I miss it. I miss the Haus, everyone.”

“Everyone?”

“Well, not everyone. I had the worst neighbor, the guy who lived across from me. He was trouble.”

“Yeah, aren’t you lucky, never seeing that boy any more. Especially now that you’re going to be in California for the next time he’s available to visit you,” Bitty had meant for it to come out as a joke, but he couldn’t avoid some of his hurt coming out in his tone.

“Oh! Yeah sorry, that’s what I wanted to talk about. Come with me!”

“Come with you? To California? For a week? Jack I can’t just… are you sure you want me to… what about the team and…” he trailed off, his hand searching deftly for Senor Bun. He’d met the Falcs, of course. But a week in Providence, where Bitty could hide in Jack’s apartment, was different from flying across the country with them and spending a week. With twenty pro hockey players. Twenty pro hockey players that didn’t know that Jack was his _boyfriend_.

“Yeah! It’s totally fine. I worked everything out with everyone. Ok not everyone on the team, but the higher ups. We can be on a different flight, you can stay at a different hotel. I wouldn’t be able to stay with you all night the night before the game, but after we play the Ducks, we’ve got two full free days to ourselves in Los Angeles. All you havta do is come. A pretty good plan, eh?”

“Well…” Bitty trailed off, holding Senor Bun up in the air. It was a good plan. They’d never had an actual vacation before, and true, Jack would be playing at the beginning and end of the break. But two day of vacation were better than zero. And they were better than hiding in Jack’s apartment.

“We play the Ducks on that Ssaturday. And we play the Kings that Tuesday. We fly back to Providence Wednesday. We’ve got a game here the following Friday. So, you could come stay at my place for the rest of spring break, we can have Easter together the week after that too, if you want. I want to spend as much time with you as I can get. I’m sorry this is so hard.”

Bitty, who had already made up his mind, smiled slyly into his phone, “Well, I mean, vacation with you in California _could_ sound alright, but where would I bake if I’m all cooped up in a hotel?”

Jack laughed, making sure that Bitty was joking, though he was only about ninety percent sure, “Well actually, if you’re coming for sure, there’s a second thing I wanted to ask you about.”

Bitty clutched Senor Bun a little closer and nodded, forgetting that it was a phone conversation and that Jack couldn’t hear his gestures over the phone.

“I got these, uh, tickets? From Georgia. Apparently a lot of pro sports players can get them. Anyways, I figure, we’ll be stuck in Anaheim for two days after the game. So why not enjoy the main attraction of Anaheim, eh?”

“Jack, honey, you know I don’t really like baseball, and if I did, why would I like the Angels?” Somewhere, above Bitty, Chowder screamed again.

Jack laughed softly, “No Bitty, not baseball. What else is in Anaheim?”

“The… Ocean? You don’t need tickets for the ocean.”

“Nope. One more guess.”

“I don’t know, sweetheart. I don’t know anything about Los Angeles. Wait, _you_ don’t know anything about Los Angeles.”

“I know a lot about this place. I went there a whole bunch. As a _kid,_ ” he stressed the last word carefully, which only confused Bitty even more.

A thump on the ceiling about Bitty startled him out of his confusion. Chowder was shouting something that got muffled through Ransom and Holster’s floorboards. Eric heard him running down from the attic before tapping on his door.

“DISNEYLAND” Chowder yelled before, presumably, finding a new hiding spot.

“Honey?” Bitty whispered to his phone, “Jack, is it Disneyland? Are we going to Disneyland?”

“I already got the tickets and the hotel room. I was just waiting for the ok from you. Is that ok?”

To say that Bitty squealed would have been an understatement, “Jack, baby, I love you, I love you so much. You are the greatest boyfriend. Oh gosh. I have to start planning! You’re bringing all your camera stuff right? Oh of couse you are. I think we can get everything done in two days, we should be able to. I think. I’m actually not sure. I’ve never been before. I’ve never even been to Disneyworld before. I wonder if Ransom has a spreadsheet to help me plan this. Wow. Disneyland?! This is incredible. Jack, I love you thank you thank you thank you.”

“De rien, ma petite tarte aux pommes. Je t’aime”

Bitty knew that one. Lately Jack had taken to using the weirdest kitchen related pet names. Being called Jack’s little apple pie was no weirder than his _petit pomme de terre a four_ or his _petit fouet_.

“How were the boys this week? I saw the shot Hunter made against the Hurricanes, what a beauty,” Eric rolled on to his stomach as Jack began to relate the week’s events. He smiled into his pillow, hugging his chest, as he counted down the days until spring break.

 

 

/////\\\\\\\\\

 

Chowder was wrapped up in three blankets on the awful green couch when Bitty came down stairs. It would have been the perfect opportunity for Bity to take his revenge, if Ransom and Holster hadn’t beaten him to it first, presumably for using the attic as a hiding spot. They were both sprawled on top of him, debating if the Ben Afleck Daredevil was terrible enough to transcend to a cult classic.

“Bro. Evanescence. All I gotta say.”

Chowder whined slightly under their shifting weigts, and Bitty’s heart broke for his son.

“Hey Ransom, I need some help with a spreadsheet! And I need someone to lick the bowl after I make brownies.” The two captains left off of the groaning goalie and ran to the kitchen without another word about shiny red spandex. Bitty leaned over Chowder, careful not to touch the couch. “Do you think you can get everything at Disneyland done in two days?” Bitty asked as he offered a hand to help Chris off the couch.

“Probably,” the goalie shrugged, “I mean, I haven’t been in a while. But a lot of stuff is shut down for the next few years. So yeah, probably. Maybe not like, all the characters? And shows? But you can get most of the rides and big parades and stuff. You’re not mad that I stole your phone?”

Bitty laughed, “I’ll only be mad if Jack doesn’t follow through on your promise.”

He wasn’t about to let the Ducks get in the way of him and Jack at the happiest place on Earth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> petit pomme de terre au four- little baked potato  
> fouet- wisk


	2. Hat Trick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack's morning at Disneyland goes exactly as planned. Bitty's plan, that is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually put off homework because I felt bad promising a Disney trip and then not actually having them go to Disneyland in the first chapter. Oops.  
> This turned into more of a "ficlet per ride" sort of thing, rather than trying to lay out every detail of their day. Because honestly, it can get pretty boring. 
> 
> Also, a point from the first chapter, Chowder hating the Ducks is this California rivalry thing. I don't know. I'm not a Sharks fan, but I know that the Kings and the Sharks both don't like the Ducks. I think.
> 
> For more stuff, follow my Check Please tumblr! It's litshitzimbit  
> It's a pretty new blog with very little following, but I've got little art things and I'll eventually post a lot more on it.

Jack Zimmerman’s brain knew he was on vacation. His internal clock was a whole other story. He had promised himself he would at least attempt to sleep in, for Bitty’s sake, more than his own. They had a long day ahead of them and knew that neither of them would be in the best mood by midnight.

He had woken for the final time close to 6, having fought all his instincts when he naturally woke up at 4:30. By the time 7:30 rolled around, Jack set his book down, leaned over and whispered into Bitty’s ear until the smaller man’s eyes opened slowly.

“J-Jack? Jack we’re on vacation lemme sleep mmmmgf…” he trailed off as he wrapped himself up, further stealing the comforter off of Jack’s lap.

Jack only laughed, rolling out of the bed and heading for the bathroom, “I know, ma petite cuillère. That’s why I’m waking you up. The park opens in thirty minutes.”

“Park? Parks don’t have open times. They just have times you won’t get arrested during. Why are we going to a park? Jack?”

Bitty’s head popped out of his quilted cocoon, hair flying in all directions, and eyes still barely open. He looked around wildly, “Jack wherdja go? Jaaaaack”

His eyes scanned the hotel room, landing on a lamp with little Mickey Mouse heads etched into the metal. Eric’s groggy mind took a minute or two to put the pieces together.

From the shower, Jack could hear Bitty’s audible gasp as he remembered where they were. He smiled down at the floor.

“Jack! Jack we have to get ready! We have to be at the gates when they open! We have to-“ Bitty trailed off as he, presumably, began rummaging through the luggage for everything he would need for the day.

By the time Jack emerged from the shower, Bitty was fully dressed, and applying generous amounts of sun screen to the part of his legs that his shorts didn’t cover.

“Alright. Sunscreen, phone charger, Cliff Bars, wallet, room key. What am I missing?” Bitty mumbled as he placed the items into his fanny pack, which he had bought with the intention of taking on this trip specifically. The bright blue color had absolutely nothing to do whatsoever with his secret boyfriend’s hockey team colors. Or his secret boyfriend’s eyes. Though he did feel silly it would match the color of the jacket he was planning on wearing for the cooler parts of the morning.

“Advil and hand sanitizer,” Jack reminded him, returning to the bathroom to grab the missing items for Bitty.

            “I love you thank you,” Bitty beamed as he shoved them into the very full fanny pack. Jack reappeared behind Bitty again, this time wearing pants, and wrapped his arms around Bitty’s waist. Bitty sighed in mock annoyance, “If you’re going to keep this up, we’ll never make it in time.”

“You’re right. We’re running late, lets just go back to bed. Who needs Disneyland, eh?”

Bitty rolled his eyes, ducking out of Jack’s arm to look for his sunglasses and tie his shoes.

“Ok, Bittle, be honest. Which hat says ‘please don’t pay attention to me, I’m definitely not a pro athlete on vacation with my boyfriend that you’re not supposed to know about?’” Jack turned around, holding up two different hats. The first was a baseball hat, embellished with the logo for the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. It looks like Jack picked it up at a gas station or the airport. The other hat was as generic as it was eccentric. Leave it to Jack Zimmermann to own a pair of plain black Mickey Ears. The back of the hat had gold stitching, the cursive forming the word _Bob._

Bitty couldn’t help but let out a laugh, “I can’t believe your dad owns those! I can’t believe you took them from your dad just for today!”

Jack joined in his laughter, “Yeah, well, he and I went to Disneyland in France together. Five or six years ago? He thought it would… I don’t know. Make me happy? And we both got these. But I wasn’t going to wear the one that says Jack on it today. We have to be subtle.” He almost whispered the last word, as he placed the ears on his head.

“But people will still recognize you, right? What if they recognize me? I stand out in college games. And people know that the Falconers are in town. I mean, I’m not tweeting that we’re here. But won’t someone find out no matter what we do?” Bitty fidgeted with his hands. No twitter was hard enough, but the constant anxiety of getting caught was much, much worse.

“Eric, I’m going to tell you a secret I’ve learned over the years. We’re in Southern California. And people here don’t actually know anything about hockey. Especially college hockey. If someone asks me if I am ‘ _the Jack Zimmermann’_ I just have to ask them who that is, and they drop it. We’ll be fine. I promise.”

“Isn’t your accent a dead giveaway though?”

“What accent?” Jack responded, in a rough imitation of a Boston accent that would not be fooling anyone, as he slipped on his sunglasses. Both men burst out laughing as they headed for the door, turning it off and locking it behind them.

 

|||||||

 

Jack and Bitty made their way across the large lobby of the Grand Californian. They had been so tired after the game the night before that they hadn’t had time to admire the careful woodwork and beautiful decorations. Jack already had his camera out, taking pictures of everything, from the grand piano in the middle of the room to the large stone fireplace.

They followed the signs toward the entrance onto Downtown Disney, following a handful of other families. As they passed the Starbucks, Bitty paused, debating if he really wanted coffee before getting in line to enter the park. He shook his head, pulling Jack with him as they queued up for the security check.

Bitty opened his fanny pack, unclipping it from his waist, as Jack unslung his camera bag. They got the okay from the girl checking bags, but as they walked forward, a second security officer approached them. They beckoned Jack over to a station with a full metal detector set up, telling Bitty to stay behind. Jack, who had been through his fair share of airport security checks, got through quickly, grabbing his camera bag. He shot a laugh and an eye roll at Bitty as they told him he was fine to go.

“If that’s an indicator of how today is going to go, maybe we should be worried,” he laughed to his boyfriend, nudging his shoulder as they finally headed to the main gate.

After a short line of people, Jack and Bitty presented the older woman working the turnstile with their tickets. She quickly scanned both, and Bitty pushed through.

Soft music played over the speakers. There were children and strollers getting caught around each other as parents tried to contain their excitement. A group of teenagers celebrating the beginning of their spring break pushed past Bitty. He almost bumped into a long line of people waiting to take a photo in front of the flowers in the shape of Mickey Mouse.

“Jack? Jack we’re here. We’re at Disneyland!” Bitty whispered, stopping dead in his tracks.

“Come on, we’ve got a stop to make before we can start your big plan,” Jack smiled down at him, grabbing his hand and pulling him towards the left entrance to Main Street.

They approached a small podium. The girl beamed at them, “Good morning! What can I help you with today?”

“Hi, uh… yes. It’s my… friend here’s first visit.”

“Oh!” She beamed even brighter. She looked at Bitty, “What’s your name?”

“Uh, Eric”

The woman focused her attention to a disk on the podium. A minute late she handed it to him. Bitty looked down to see a large round pin that read “1ST VISIT!” with Eric written carefully across the bottom. After fixing it to his sweatshirt, he looked up to see Jack pining a similar one to his t-shit. The only difference was Jack’s read “I’m Celebrating!” sans name.

“What are you two celebrating?” The attendant inquired with a smile.

“A lot of things, really.” Jack smiled at his pin and then at Bitty. He called his thank you’s to the woman as they rushed down main street.

Bitty was torn between wanting to stop at every shop and window, but he knew there would be time for that later. He pulled up the map on his phone, glancing around to try to figure out a landmark or two.

“Alright. So Space Mountain is…” he spun in place for a second, pointing a little wildly, before Jack grabbed his shoulders from behind and steered him in the direction of Tomorrow Land. Ransom and Bitty had worked out the best way to get absolutely everything done in the two days they were at Disneyland, and the plan started with the biggest rides with the longest lines.

Jack and Bitty crossed into Tomorrow Land, past the rockets and Star Tours, and hurried to the ramp leading up to the inside of the building. The park had just opened, meaning the line was short. Jack stared at the television screen showing the description video of the ride.

“Huh,” he said softly.

“What is it?” Bitty inquired up at him.

“Well, I wasn’t sure if it would still be here when we came. But I guess it is. It’s not just going to be Space Mountain. I guess there’s some Star Wars stuff on the ride too. Which is pretty cool, eh?” He pointed to the screen which was now showing a very stern General Ackbar wishing the rider good luck.

The two men were shuffled into a long hallway, which they followed until reaching a large, open room where cars were being emptied and filled at a quick pace. Bitty began jumping up and down against the railing, looking down on the passengers just getting off of the ride.

“Alright you see that, right there?” Jack pointed to a number on the side of the huge spaceship hanging in the middle of the room, “That’s the year Space Mountain was first opened. And _that_ ,” Jack moved his hand to point at another number on the ship, “was the year they renovated it.”

“How do you know these things, babe?” Bitty turned to look at him, almost running over the couple who had stopped in front of them.

“Dunno. I came here a lot as a kid, since dad always got tickets. I like the little pieces of history hidden everywhere.”

“Nerd”

“How many in your party?” an employee interrupted.

Jack held up two fingers and inquired, “So sorry, but could we, by any chance, wait for the front row?” Bitty’s eyes went wide, nodding at Jack in agreement.

They only ended up waiting through two different rotations of cars, before boarding. Bitty stuffed his fanny pack in the pouch in front of his seat, while Jack placed his camera bag firmly between his feet.

“Pull up on your lap bar,” a young man commanded as everyone in the car pushed up and down rigorously on the safety restraints. The cart lurched forward as they rounded the corner. The room was pitch black. The speakers in the car blared the first note of the Star Wars opening titles so suddenly that Bitty jumped. He took a deep breath and grabbed Jack’s hand as the coaster car began to climb the hill.

 

|||||||

 

“Jack that was AMAZING oh my gosh we need to go on that again later wow WOW!!” Bitty exclaimed as he bounded the stairs toward the exit. The larger man hurried to keep pace.

“Oh Bitty, wait come over here,” he beaconed to the video screens lining one wall. After a second, all the pictures changed to new images of the passengers on Space Mountain. Jack let out a laugh that could me more easily recognized as a sneeze. Bitty ran over, before doubling over in laughter. The only word to describe his face in the image was _bulging._ His eyes were popping out of his head and his smile crossed his entire face. Jack, on the other hand, looked as if her were trying to make his face as small as possible. His eyes were tight shut; his chin was tight to his chest. The only thing not tight and squished about Jack in the image was his hair, which was flying in every direction above his head.

Bitty was still wiping his tears as Jack pulled him along. “Don’t you have a schedule to keep?” Jack half pleaded. In response, he got Bitty’s index finger telling him to wait. Eric snapped a photo of their picture on his phone. “I thought you weren’t tweeting this,” Jack full pleaded now.

“Its just the group chat, we’re fine.”

 

Ransom: BROOOOOOOOOO

Lardo: You’re getting a 3 foot painting of these faces for Christmas.

Shitty: can I also get one of those paintings?

Chowder: I hope you’re having fun!

Lardo: No you can’t

Chowder: Also thank you Jack for beating the Ducks!

Shitty: please. Its important and you love me

Lardo: paint it yourself

Lardo: wait no please dont do that

Shitty: IM GONNA PAINT IT

 

            “What have you done,” Jack shook his head, “We’re never going to hear the end of these chirps”

Bitty was still wiping his eyes as they began walking over to Star Tours.

“As long as they keep it of the jumbotron, you should be fine, sweetheart,” he chided. Jack just rolled his eyes as they got in line.

|||||||

 

After Star Tours, the men crossed Main Street to get to Adventure Land. They approached the automated booth for Indian Jones Fast Passes with caution. Bitty stuck his ticket in first, and a second ticket was spit out. Jack followed suit. They made plans to return for the ride at 11, once the passes were activated.

“Alright, what next?” Jack asked as he put both of his tickets back in his bag, exchanging them for his camera so that he could take a few photos of the trees and buildings that surrounded them.

“Weeeell… If I remember correctly, it’s Haunted Mansion. But-“ Before Bitty could continue his stomach growled wildly. He sighed, “But first, I think we need to give your nutritionist a heart attack.”

Beignets weren’t on the NHL diet list. But Jack figured that vacation was just one long cheat day. And, he had to admit, as he tried to keep powdered sugar off of his black shirt, he missed the fried dough.

“Why does Disneyland only serve bad coffee?” Bitty mumbled into his cup as he took another sip, regardless.

“I saw a Starbucks on Main Street, if you’d rather go there for your… caramel… latte… pumpkin…. Frappuccinos?” Jack’s tone was dead serious, but his eyes gave him away.

“Ha Ha mister oblivious coffee man,” Bitty rolled his eyes at his boyfriend as he took another bite of the mouse shaped dough.

 

|||||||

 

“Is this haunted room _actually_ stretching? Or is it your imagination?” The ghostly voice boomed around. A toddler standing next to Bitty let out a sob. She absolutely lost it as the lights turned out and a woman’s prerecorded scream led a group of rowdy teenagers to scream with her.

Jack grabbed Bitty’s hand as they were sent down a long hallway, like sheep, and pushed into a black sphere shaped buggy. Jack squished a little closer to his boyfriend than usual, throwing his arm over the smaller man’s shoulder. As they pulled away from the loading zone, Jack placed a kiss into Bitty’s temple.

“Sweetheart, not that I don’t like this, I do. But aren’t we a little old for messy handjobs in the dark on this ride? And aren’t there a ton of cameras everywhere to stop it?”

“Mmmmm I was just thinking its been over an hour since the last time I got to kiss you with a little privacy, but I can see your line of thinking too.” Jack sighed, his lips near Bitty’s ear. He didn’t physically move his body but his eyes shifted onto the ride and robotic figures.

When they reached a large ballroom, the ride slowed. The ghostly voice apologized for cranky spirits as the buggy fully stopped. Bitty turned, kissing his boyfriend on the lips for a lingering second before turning back to look at the ghosts that appeared and disappeared, twirling around the dance floor.

“See that spider web?” Jack whispered, and Bitty nodded, “It’s a giant crack in the glass. They don’t want to replace the huge of a piece of glass, so they just stuck a fake spider to it.”

Bitty laughed, snuggling even closer to Jack, to the point where he was almost sat in Jack’s lap. The ghost voice apologized again as the buggy came back to life, moving them into the next room.

“I think the ghost host is Canadian,” Bitty whispered in Jack’s ear, “he’s apologizing too much. Like someone I know.”

“Sorry, I can’t help it”

“You just apologized for apologizing. What am I ever going to do with you?”

 

|||||||

 

The large boat floated through an almost believable swamp. Jack and Bitty sat in the back row of the miniature ship on Pirates of the Caribbean, admiring every little detail that went into the ride.

“Is that a real restaurant?” Bitty asked, his eyes growing wide.

“Yup”

“Oh wow. I wish I’d looked more into where to eat. That would have been so fun to go there.”

“Well, Mister Bittle, you’re in luck. We have reservations for 7:45.”

Eric sat back and admired just how much he loved his boyfriend.

When the first drop came, Jack held his camera close to his chest, to keep it from getting wet. By the second drop, Bitty realized that he had been sitting in a puddle the whole time, and his butt would have a nice wet spot after the ride. As they traveled through the series of caves and depictions of skeletons doing pirate things, the young boy asked his mother no, less than five times, where Jack Sparrow was.

“We wants the Red Head. WE WANTS THE RED HEAD!”

“That’s… pretty messed up, right? It’s the sex trade. They’re buying and selling women for… yeah for sex.”

“Shitty is smiling from wherever he is now, sweetheart. You’re doin’ him proud.”

“There are _children_ here. Children who are going to see this. Pirates shouldn’t really be romanticized. This isn’t at all a historic representation of what pirates were like. They robbed and murdered and did terrible things to women. I just…”

Bitty rubbed his boyfriend’s arm in sympathy.

As the boat climbed the ramp out of the lower level of the ride, Jack pointed to a painting of two women at the entrance of the ride.

“Alright, you see those two? They were real pirates, super important ones. So Disney wanted to put them on the ride with the other important real pirates. Except they were a lesbian couple, and a bunch of people made a fuss. So Disney put them off to the side, behind some crates. Because, ya know, murder and theft and sex trade is fine, but as soon as you’re gay, that’s it, you’re impeding our family virtues.”

Jack sat back in the seat, and Bitty squeezed his hand tightly.

 

|||||||

 

“Aw jeez it’s hot.”

“Jack, it’s like 80 degrees. And it’s only 10 in the morning.” The exit from the air-conditioned interior of Pirates of the Caribbean had made the heat seem more drastic, but Bitty agreed that it felt better once he had tied his sweatshirt around his waist. If the jacket helped to cover the stain the water had left on his backside, he wasn’t complaining about that either.

They decided they would get fast passes for Splash Mountain before they went on Indiana Jones, with only an hour wait until that tickets were able to be used and new ones could be redeemed. They walked towards Big Thunder Mountain.

“What’s behind that wall over there?” Bitty peered through the people as they got in line.

“I’m not positive, but I believe it’s Star Wars Land?”

“OHMYGOSH Jack we need to come back once it’s open”

“Ah ha ha alright Bittle, we will”

“Also can we sit in the front row of this one again?”

“Actually, on Thunder Mountain, it’s better to sit in the back. There’s this really cool trick with… I don’t know what it’s with. I think centrifugal force? I don’t know. If you sit in the back and go down this one hill and look at the goat the whole time, it feels super neat.”

“Did you just say neat?”

 

|||||||

 

“Why do you want to go on this ride, again? It looks boring” Bitty was hopping from foot to foot, questioning his boyfriend’s opinion on ride choices, after the fast roller coaster, as they waited their turn to get into the giant honeycomb on the Winnie the Pooh ride.

“Because it’s a nice ride. And I like going on it? And what happened to _every ride_ , eh?”

“Oh really, Jack? Isn’t it for babie- Oh my gosh I take it all back. Look Jack. Look it’s Rabbit. I want to meet Rabbit after we get off the ride. And is that- TIGGER JACK PLEASE we need to meet Tigger. And Rabbit. Especially Rabbit.”

 

|||||||

 

Splash Mountain Fast Passes and a camera full of photos of Bitty posing with a giant orange tiger… thing in hand, they headed back towards Adventure Land. They made a quick stop by Tarzan’s Treehouse, where Jack got more photos of Bitty, now on the rope bridge. Bitty took the camera as Jack scaled the short vertical rope climb, showing off his upper arm strength.

“What happened to _subtlety_?” Bitty chirped as Jack straightened his hat and sunglasses. Jack only shrugged, turning the corner to Indiana Jones.

They presented their Fast Passes and were sent in a separate line. The cool air of the temple greeted them, and Jack was thankful to be out of the dry California spring air. They wound their way through caves and stone rooms.

In one room covered in spikes and skulls, Jack pulled on a pole located near the exit. A horrible crash sounded, making Bitty jump. When he turned to look back in the room, however, everything was perfectly the same. Jack just laughed and pushed Bitty down the line further. They found themselves in a large open room. Bitty couldn’t help but stop and once again stare at the sheer craftsmanship that went into creating the ride.

He took out his phone to send a snapchat to Lardo, only to be greeted with a lack of phone reception. Jack reached over, pulling on another rope that went down a well in the middle of the room. The sound of a man screaming sounded from the inside of the well.

“Huh. Jack, Wellie makes that exact same noise when you pull her rope too.”

“Who _dared_ pull Wellie’s rope?”

“I’ll give you a hint. Their names rhyme with handsom and upholster.”

 

|||||||

 

“Wave goodbye to the people on the dock. Bye people! You’re never going to see any of them ever again.”

The Jungle Cruise boat pulled away from the dock and into a thick layer of foliage. Their tour guide gave them joke after joke of terrible puns. Most were awful dad jokes, and Bitty looked up from his free map of the ride to see Jack laughing louder than most people in the boat.

“And if you don’t believe me, well, you’re in _de nile_.” Jack laughed even harder.

“Oh come on, Bittle. That was a good one. You have to admit.”

For Bitty, and the majority of the people on board the little boat, the funniest part of the whole trip was the strange, large Canadian man, losing it over the backside of water.

 

|||||||

 

They got gumbo in bread bowls for lunch. Bitty mades a comment about how it’s already lunchtime; the day is slipping away. Jack looked at him with a soft smile, because the day wasn’t even halfway over and it had already the best day ever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ma petite cuillère- My little spoon. Jack thinks he's really clever with that one.  
> Also: I know I said it's Disneyland as it is today. But Jungle Cruise is under construction right now and I needed them (ok Jack) to go on it. Just letting you know in case you happen to be planning your Disneyland trip based on this fic or something.  
> Next Up: Fireworks (and everything that happens in the 9 hours before them)


End file.
